Post #3 - Q: Do you really p*nish your husband for real, or is it a game? Do you spank him when you p*nish him?
Yes, I do really p*nish my husband. It's not a game. At all. But there is p*nishment, and there is P*nishment. Spanking? Meh... it depends...
First of all, let me be clear. I am not writing to educate or give tips. I am writing because some people are curious and have asked me to, and because it is time consuming to answer everyone personally in PM. I do not claim any knowledge. I am stil learning, and everything I write are personal experiences and nothing else. There exists no right way to live in an FLR, just as there are no right way to live vanilla. Anyone who claim otherwise have a kink that triggers them and have their own idea of how it should be. More on that later. Everything I write is only my own experiences in this one single case. I am no expert. No one is.
My husband receives p*nishment. Let's say he cums too soon, wets his sheets with sperm in his cage during the night or touch his pee-pee when it's hard (as in one of my latest videos - it's forbidden), I might p*nish him by putting him over my knees and spank him, or maybe deny him a release for a week or two. I understand the difference between accidents and real disobedience. What I have discovered, and this is actually a tip to all beginning dommes, is that spanking is actually a reward. Here any submissive male reading this is free to challenge me on this claim, but I will not believe you. If I put you on top of my knees and give you a spanking on the butt because you talked back to me, I am actually rewarding you. Forget it. Sexual p*unishments are reserved for accidents, like cumming too soon or that the pee-pee does not fill the cage satisfactory in my opinion.
But! When hubby is talking back to me or behaves in a very bad way that I for real do not appreciate, there is P*nishment, not p*nishment. Sexual p*unishment is not really p*nishment. It is a reward. Hubby and I have decided to live in an FLR, Just to be clear: It is completely voluntary from both parts. If he or I say we stop, we stop, and we will still love each other and live vanilla. Though I prefer this. More on that topic later.
What is the difference between p*nishment and P*unishment? Well, the worst thing I can do to hubby is simple: I simply just stop dominating him. Yes, it is that simple. For example, if he tries to top from bottom, I let him. Ok, so let's be vanilla, then. If he ever tries to top from bottom, I simply stop being Mistress K. I can guarantee he comes crawling back. It took some time before I realised the difference between p*nishment and P*nishment, I have to admit.
I remember one particular incidence s*x yars ago or so. Hubby had a bad day, but let his frustration pour my way. I went to the bathroom, irritated and told him he had one chance. I waited, and about f*ur minutes later he came to me and got down on his knees and apologised. I was really upset and pointed my finger at him. I believe I was actually screaming, or at least very clear in my tone. It wasn't a game at all. I think it was one of the most serious talks we ever had, actually. I gave him a choice. I asked if he wanted his Mistress or only a wife. He told me he wanted both. No spanking, folks! P*unishment was no domination for a week. He got the point, but wanted to contiue, and agreed he poured his frustration on to the wrong person.
After the week of no domination, I asked him if he was serious about this. Before he answered "yes", I told him:
I am!
Result :No orgasms for years. Is it P*nishment, p*nishment or a reward? You be the judge.